So, I'm going through a bit of a trial. I mean, it's not like it's a huge one or anything. It is important, though. I desire to spend more time with God. I physically catch myself missing Him. And I know I can't miss anything that I haven't experienced, right? I feel as if I fail Him so frequently. I know I fail Him. I know that I disappoint Him. I know He loves me. I know that He knows that I love Him. I just need so desperately to spend time with Him. I feel Him calling me toward Him.
I declare Joy, Peace, Freedom.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Saturday, October 18, 2008
I'm gonna change the world
So, maybe I'm not the first to state that. Nor is it the first time I've said it. This time, however, is the first time I've said it believing that it is God's will. So what if I'm only 19 going on 20 years old. I don't care. God doesn't care. You shouldn't care. I refuse to inhibit the calling of the LORD on my life because of my age, gender, ethnicity, family, and friends. I no longer care if I am known as the 'religious one' because I'm gonna stand up for what I believe in and I'm going to do what the Lord has called me to do.
Here's the thing: I know that somewhere in my future God has BIG things for me. How do I know this, you ask? It's because He told me when I was 13 years old. And nothing has changed that calling. It's stronger on my life than when it was 7 years ago.
After moving to start nursing school, I joined an amazing church and it felt really good to just sit after the serving I had done in my prior church. I had this feeling of refreshing and revival and it was much needed. However, after a few months I realized how important it is to get back into serving. After all, that is how souls are won and believe it or not, God and you can form one heck of a relationship while you serve.
I joined the choir, after knowing that it is NOT what God wanted me to do. He wanted me to be a door greeter. Now, for all you who don't know me... I've always sang. My entire life. I've sang and been on worship teams and lead worship and up until the time I left my prior church I lead quite frequently for both the youth during community outreaches and for the adult team on Sunday evenings. A few Sunday Mornings, also. It's what I do. It is what my calling is. (Though I can tell you that I am/was not ready to do this type of ministry yet for lack of training.) So, I saw no harm in joining the choir recently at church just after God had conveniently (not!) shut every door for me to go into the music ministry. And God has kept the doors he closed once, shut. I don't like this. I like to sing. I like to lead. I am born to lead. God said, You were born to lead, but first you must learn to follow...Me. Yea, not so easy, Lord. But I'm doing it. I felt way before joining the choir that God was telling me to greet people coming into the church. Did I surrender to His will?
No. Why? Because it's not what I wanted to do. Plus, I had this horrible mentality that door greeters is what people do because they have no other talent. ( I know. You door greeters can hurt me ) I know the truth now, though. Every single position in the church has been ordained by God. Every single one of them are just as important as the next. And now, because of my prideful attitude God is teaching me a huge lesson. I'm going to be a door greeter. I may hate it. I may love it. Before God will let me do anything else, He is letting me break myself before He has to do it. (Believe me, I don't want God breaking me.) I praise Him that He loves me enough to give me the chance to change before He really punishes me.
So, for you that serve as door greeters, number 1. I love you. and number 2. I'm going to serve with you. And I'm going to see that God has a purpose for all of us.
From now until He comes for me... I will obey Him. That is how I'm going to begin to change the world.
Here's the thing: I know that somewhere in my future God has BIG things for me. How do I know this, you ask? It's because He told me when I was 13 years old. And nothing has changed that calling. It's stronger on my life than when it was 7 years ago.
After moving to start nursing school, I joined an amazing church and it felt really good to just sit after the serving I had done in my prior church. I had this feeling of refreshing and revival and it was much needed. However, after a few months I realized how important it is to get back into serving. After all, that is how souls are won and believe it or not, God and you can form one heck of a relationship while you serve.
I joined the choir, after knowing that it is NOT what God wanted me to do. He wanted me to be a door greeter. Now, for all you who don't know me... I've always sang. My entire life. I've sang and been on worship teams and lead worship and up until the time I left my prior church I lead quite frequently for both the youth during community outreaches and for the adult team on Sunday evenings. A few Sunday Mornings, also. It's what I do. It is what my calling is. (Though I can tell you that I am/was not ready to do this type of ministry yet for lack of training.) So, I saw no harm in joining the choir recently at church just after God had conveniently (not!) shut every door for me to go into the music ministry. And God has kept the doors he closed once, shut. I don't like this. I like to sing. I like to lead. I am born to lead. God said, You were born to lead, but first you must learn to follow...Me. Yea, not so easy, Lord. But I'm doing it. I felt way before joining the choir that God was telling me to greet people coming into the church. Did I surrender to His will?
No. Why? Because it's not what I wanted to do. Plus, I had this horrible mentality that door greeters is what people do because they have no other talent. ( I know. You door greeters can hurt me ) I know the truth now, though. Every single position in the church has been ordained by God. Every single one of them are just as important as the next. And now, because of my prideful attitude God is teaching me a huge lesson. I'm going to be a door greeter. I may hate it. I may love it. Before God will let me do anything else, He is letting me break myself before He has to do it. (Believe me, I don't want God breaking me.) I praise Him that He loves me enough to give me the chance to change before He really punishes me.
So, for you that serve as door greeters, number 1. I love you. and number 2. I'm going to serve with you. And I'm going to see that God has a purpose for all of us.
From now until He comes for me... I will obey Him. That is how I'm going to begin to change the world.
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