Let me GO

My heart is so easily overwhelmed when I watch stories about people in other countries. The Nations just hold a special place in my heart. This doesn't mean that I am not moved by the stories of my own people. I struggle when I see humanity suffering on any front.

My friend just got back from Haiti. He went doing an assessment of the area he will be taking a team for some relief work in the future. When I learned he was going, my heart kind of dropped into my stomach. I just want to go. Though I know I will in due time, it is hard to wait patiently. Especially when I know there are things I could be doing. When I know there is so much to do, and I am forced to continue in my day to day life here until I gain the experience I need to be fully effective and beneficial to those there. There's so much about it that just feels so wrong.

There have been times since returning from El Salvador about a year ago, that I realize that the way I live is so far from the true reality of how the majority of the whole world lives. I guess I always keep this in the back of my mind, but there are moments where I become so overwhelmed by the difference in my home in Missouri and the home of my friends in other countries. I also wonder why God has allowed me to be in the blessed part of the world. I praise and thank the Lord for this blessing, but I'm ready to be a part of reality.

I have no idea what my future looks like, though I know that God has destined me to live among reality.

Tonight, I just want to talk to someone who gets me. Who can understand this desire to be somewhere that most people would never enter. To live in a place that people try to leave. Someone who is created the way I have been created... I may come across as weird, crazy, even dumb to some, and I can see how logically I sound unstable. But this is the truth....

:-/,
Kayla