Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Fundraising for COH update!

3 weeks from tomorrow I will be headed to Convoy of Hope located at 330 S. Patterson Springfield, MO. Seriously so close. I went out today to drop off a check for some money I have raised. Man, it's so tightly close. It makes me so nervous.

At this very moment, I'm not sure the exact amount that I have raised. It's not a whole ton, but it's getting there. Please, prayer warriors be praying! And if you don't consider yourself a prayer warrior, go to battle on behalf of all the people that can/will be blessed by servanthood during this trip! I need you!

To the point of this blog---

There is a HUGE weekend coming up for me in like 2 days. I still can't believe how much needs to be done. I was really counting on the Lord allowing us to do the bake sale up here in Springfield. So many more people up here to buy the delicious homebaked goods, but Walmart failed me. So, I'm going back home to do the bake sale at Richards Brothers. Which is totally fine! I'm absolutely cool with it. I like the people at home, and they know me well. I also have had a great manager to work with me. He even let us borrow a table last time we held the sale there! PTL. Anyway, I am doing the sale this Saturday morning at 8 am until we have sold everything. I have a LOT of people helping bake stuff! I am so very blessed!

Then, on Sunday, I have the privilege of a hometown pastor allowing me and my family to make and host dinner after Sunday evening church in another effort to raise the funds for this trip. So much work, but so worth it!! My family and friends are awesome.

Here is where I need your help. I need to raise about 800 dollars this weekend. Sounds like a LOT, huh? That's because it is a lot...to us here on earth. But to the Lord, money is nothing. Money grows on trees in Heaven. ;-) It's endless, limitless, and holds no boundaries to the Lord. I know that He can work miraculous things. I am asking for you to get on your knees with me and pray as hard and fervently as you can that I raise these funds this weekend.

I wholly believe, trust, and am leaning on Jesus to make this possible. I think I should write a book and let other people see how God is moving and has moved in my life. I can't even imagine the things that have not yet come to pass!

Pray!!

xoxo

Friday, May 22, 2009

Blessed beyond measure...

W o w.

3 simple letters sum up so very much. I'm not entirely sure what my future holds, but I know it's in God's hands. When you truly understand that, peace is surreal. My faith has been grown so much lately. It's not been an easy process, nor will it become easier, but truly trusting God has it all under control is so relieving. It gets really old when people are saying constantly, Just trust the Lord, He knows everything. Even though that is true, sometimes it's just not the most enlightening statement at the time. But now, I can actually tell myself that, and know that it is true. Not just know, but feel. Difference, there is one!

Even though there is SO much to think about and do, I really need to just slow down in mind. My body is moving quickly, and I don't think my mind is keeping up. Anyone ever feel that way? :) I smile typing that, because I know how common the feeling is. God is not one of confusion. So, I know that the straight way will eventually make itself known. I am so excited for what may be coming my way.

Continue to pray, my friends! God is not only hearing you, but He is seriously answering your prayers. Even if I can't see everything going on. The heavenly realm is holding majestic works, all just waiting to make themselves clear!

xoxo

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

A new song!

So, I was sitting in service tonight, and these words just came to me. No tune put to them yet, but my mind was totally geared toward the upcoming Mission Internship.

Chorus:
God, Your people are hungry
Your people, Lord, are so lonely
God, Your people are poor
Your people, Lord, are our responsibility

Verse 1:
Your favor is upon me and Your love abounds
Without Your hand, I wouldn't be here
This journey is only beginning
My training just at the start
Use me, oh Lord, to love Your people.

Verse 2:
I promise to give all that I am,
Down to the very end, only You'll remain
Bless all those I'll tell about You
Open every heart and mind
Use me, oh Lord, to love Your people

So, I'm not a songwriter, at least not anymore. But, I just feel like this could catch on in my life, and I can't wait to sit down at a guitar or piano and put it to music. I haven't written music in so long... It feels good to get a fresh touch from the Lord in this area.

Today/Tonight has been AMAZING. So may opportunities have just opened up to me, and I don't know how to really deal with them all. I want to make the best decision; the one the Lord wants me to make. I can't wait to spend intimate time with Him. Honestly, I can't wait to meet Him face to face. I can't believe the favor on my life. I just simply can't. I knew I was made for something great for the Lord. I knew I would do things for Him... things that some people just won't do, but I didn't know it was going to feel so RIGHT. All of the things that have happened are just these things that I could never have dreamed would happen to me. My biggest dreams all seem so small right now.
Do you realize what that means? I need/can dream even bigger! Those dreams may feel very small one day too! :-)

Pray for me. A lot is coming up and I have alot of decisions to make!

I love you guys so much!!!

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Wait, what did you just say?

So, normally I wouldn't do this. But, for some reason, I feel the urge to write all about this. In May of 2007, I found out that my just-turned-16-year-old sister was pregnant. It wasn't quite a shock, (not meaning that badly at all), but I knew what was going on. It was quite the ordeal, but I love my nephew very much. I went through the whole, "My sister is having a baby before me," type deal. It was tough, but it was obviously not undefeatable (the feeling that is..). And obviously, the baby wasn't going anywhere. But, through it all, the family stayed alive and in one piece. And, we all love Shelby and baby Jalen very very much.

Tonight... 2 years later, I get more shocking news. I'm going to have a niece. No, Shelby isn't pregnant again, but she's getting MARRIED. The man she is getting married to has a daughter. He's a great guy. Truly is. But, I'm just dumbfounded.

And, I feel kind of selfish right now. I mean, I know that life is life, and I have to deal with whatever comes with it. And, not only deal with it, but deal with it well... My own thoughts right now are selfish. I admit it. You don't have to call me out on it, and please don't judge me or tell me how bad of a person I am for feeling this way. You'd probably feel like it too.

This is supposed to happen to me first.

I am the oldest child, grandchild, sister, and niece. Why don't I get to experience all of this first? I wanted to get married, live a little life together, have the first baby for everyone to melt over and whatnot, and then watch my sisters follow suit. I know plenty of you, (especially family), are probably furious over my feelings, but instead of bringing them up in 3 months verbally, I felt writing them would be better. And, if you don't know about the engagement, I'm not the one who told you. Clear? Good.

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Letter to Self

I JUST came across perhaps one of the most greatest things I could have ever come across at this time in my life. It probably won't mean much to you, but then again, this blog is about my journey in life. And I want to do life with you. I hope you enjoy this as much as I do. At my high school graduation party on 5/12/07, my precious Mom began a journal for me to write in. She was the first to write in it a one page letter just wishing me luck and sweet words. Then, the journal was passed around over the course of the party and church, and dear people wrote very encouraging words and blissful memories that I reflect upon once in a while. I myself have made a few entries, but I plan on making many more. The day's I am living in as God takes me on this crazy adventurous life of mine are one's that I always want in record. I want to never forget them.

I know myself pretty well, (obviously), and I know how easily I forget things that move my heart, and so as I was reading through all the entries, I came to the last one. I was bawling my eyes out because I just realize how much I am loved and I want to make sure my family knows that I LOVE them more than life can EVER breathe. I wish I could give them EVERYTHING. I seriously could NOT ever live without them. Well, knowing my own forgetfulness, on 4/21/08, I wrote myself a letter. I will type it the same way I wrote it and I hope you love this.

4/21/08
So, Kayla, How are you doing? I, Kayla (You), have decided to write a little recap of the things you have been through lately. Iknow ho you like to remember things, so I'm gonna try and help you out. #1, you are 3 1/2 weeks away from completing your first year in college. It has been tough, and with finals week approaching, it is only going to get togher. However, nursing school is right around the corner, and God has something fabulous in store for you! You talked to your Mom tonight and had a very pleasant conversation. You talked about the upcoming Silver Dollar City trip you and the family are taking on May 2. It's gonna be so much fun. Just remember to live lightly. You love your family. Remember and always trust them like you do love them! Because they do love you, too!
#2 For the past few weeks, God has really done anumber on you. He has convicted you of that habitual sin. (Rember which one I'm talkin' about?) You've done so good in controlling yourself and God is slowly perfecting you like He wants so desperately to do.
#3 The book "Captivating" by John + Stasi Eldredge has been helping you change your life by making you see how captivating and truly beautiful you are. God loves you and He's using many people around you to show it.
#4 John Linell at James River Assembly has helped open your eyes to how amazingly lovestruck a Pastor can be. He is anointed by God to share the gospel through teaching. "Lessons in Leadership" out of 2 Samuel has taught you many things. I.E. Ahithophel, who was on David's counsel, was the grandfather of Bathsheba. (I'm sure you haven't forgotten this, b/c it was pretty cool to learn.)
Kayla, I know how easy it is for you to become sidestruck from the truth. Your emotions run wild and at times, you understand nothing, but if you'll just pick up your Bible, God will speak to you. Don't ever give up on Him. After all, He's never given up on you. He has an incredible future for you and all you have to do is follow Him.
Be good Kayla,
Yourself
P.S. pick up the phone, call your family and tell them you love them. We don't know what the future holds. :)

The above is word for word, dot for dot and smiley face for smiley face what my journal says. Never did I know how true this letter would turn out.

Now I am 2 days from putting the finalizing touches on my 1st whole year of Nursing School. And God.... man, has He MOVED in my soul, heart, and body. I encourage you to sit and write a letter to yourself. More than likely, if you don't do this often, you will forget about it, and in a few years stumble across it and if you haven't changed, you know there are problems. :) No stagnant stinky water right here.

I love you guys. More to come tomorrow. Long post, I know!

Goodnight!

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

It is Time...

... for me to get up.

For the past several weeks, I've been so stagnant. Like a puddle of water. All I've been good for is hording dirt and creepy creatures. No longer will I do this.

I got rid of my facebook so I could/would spend more time with Jesus and in the Bible. But, I've done quite the opposite. I haven't spent much time in the Word at all, and I haven't even prayed that much. What have I become? This isn't me. It just goes to prove that when you aren't daily walking and talking to Him all the time, distance just happens.

It's not like I've been out doing bad things, because I most assuredly haven't. It's just that I don't talk to Him. He isn't all I think about. And it's because I've neglected our relationship. "How could I do that? Why would I do that after all He's done...?" you may ask. And my response to that is just this, I'm human. I fail. I fall. But due to God's grace, I'm allowed to stand back up and my failures don't make him love me any less. (Thank you, Lord for your love.)

So here's what I am going to do. I need your prayers, desperately. I need your encouragement via e-mail, phone, text every single day. I need to be held accountable to the Word. I want to spend time each day in prayer before the day even starts. I want to be disciplined. Moreso than in my life ever before.

I've been busy planning things and trying to come up with ideas to raise money for the Mission Internship this summer. I'm still in the process of that, and we are implementing ideas. But, please pray that I can have the faith that God is in control of this. And, if the Lord doesn't want me to go on this trip, that I can deal with that. I have been blessed with amazing prayer warriors in my life, and I'm asking YOU to stand up and intercede for/with me. And, PLEASE keep me accountable.

It is time, dear friends, it is time. I can't wait any longer. I can't push this off any more. I'm totally broken right now in God's presence. I must move forward! No more TV, and no more music in place of time with the Lord. No more reading christian books to get 'by'. I want to be totally engrossed in the living Word of the Lord.